RT.... This poem comes straight from the heart and not just from the bottom. I couldn't even tell you where the bottom is anymore for it's been broken far too many times. I'm usually not one to be down in the dumps but I can't help but feel like I've been dumped by the people I thought I could trust.
RT... I've never come to realization of how fake people could be. I'm not talking plastic or rubber...I'm talking blasé expressions and facade personalities. I'm talking Fugazi emotions, pretending and contradicting. Why?
RT... I am sick and tired of trying to please everyone because not everyone can be pleased..and I realize that now.. I wish I saw this coming earlier
RT... I appreciate those friends that let me be me.. I appreciate you being non judgmental.. I appreciate the late nights and the deep convo. True MVPs
RT... The amount of real people I know I can count on both hands.. Now don't take offense to that its only because I personally don't know you.
RT... I'm done saying real talk to make what I'm saying real damn it. I'm a pissed off black man that just wants to live his life... P.s. This isn't a race thing I promise.. Saying black just gave it a stronger meaning.
RT... I couldn't care less of what they think of me, what he thinks, what she thinks, what you think.. All I know is I've always been real and I don't plan on stopping now.
Tuesday, May 24, 2016
Sunday, May 15, 2016
I Remember When
I remember when the trees would dance
and the birds would sing
and all the old folks were just doin their thing
yeah life was rough but the times were good
reminiscin all the good vibes about the hood
like i know i should, man i miss my fam
momma's corn, mashed potatoes, and honey glazed ham
and lets not forget grams, she was the real OG
never was a smart alec she'd smack the sense outta me
im talkin til i saw pee, runnin down my pants
lookin like a fool doin the potty dance
and my uncle, you see
was makin good money
but could never help us out cause he was so stingy
with my clothes dingy
I grew up in the real struggle
steady on my grind tryin to find my hustle
everyday was difficult, a fight, a real tussle
would've never made it out without my mental muscle
I remember conning the cons and juking the junkies
they were sticky and icky and i didn't want the to touch me
cause thats when things got funky, i mean things got ugly
I mean uglier than prisoners playin a game of rugby
I got violent when needed, yo this junkie proceeded
crossed his face with a rake, it probably felt like he got cleated
when im angry im meaner
you know hulk, well im greener
didnt take haste to the case cause its only a misdemeanor
never broke any femurs, but ive broken some noses
and to all my homies ive given too many black roses
im debating on posting, this is a piece of the truth
about the strife and destruction that i went through in my youth
will i get through it? yeah! but it may take me a while
just know i stay optimistic and take on life with a smile
and the birds would sing
and all the old folks were just doin their thing
yeah life was rough but the times were good
reminiscin all the good vibes about the hood
like i know i should, man i miss my fam
momma's corn, mashed potatoes, and honey glazed ham
and lets not forget grams, she was the real OG
never was a smart alec she'd smack the sense outta me
im talkin til i saw pee, runnin down my pants
lookin like a fool doin the potty dance
and my uncle, you see
was makin good money
but could never help us out cause he was so stingy
with my clothes dingy
I grew up in the real struggle
steady on my grind tryin to find my hustle
everyday was difficult, a fight, a real tussle
would've never made it out without my mental muscle
I remember conning the cons and juking the junkies
they were sticky and icky and i didn't want the to touch me
cause thats when things got funky, i mean things got ugly
I mean uglier than prisoners playin a game of rugby
I got violent when needed, yo this junkie proceeded
crossed his face with a rake, it probably felt like he got cleated
when im angry im meaner
you know hulk, well im greener
didnt take haste to the case cause its only a misdemeanor
never broke any femurs, but ive broken some noses
and to all my homies ive given too many black roses
im debating on posting, this is a piece of the truth
about the strife and destruction that i went through in my youth
will i get through it? yeah! but it may take me a while
just know i stay optimistic and take on life with a smile
Sunday, May 8, 2016
Blue Ticket (shake)
Cause the players gonna play (x5)
And the haters gonna hate (x5)
Baby, im just gonna shake (x5)
Shake it off (x2)
and you should too! Shake what yo mama gave ya, but lets not confuse this with twerking
Shake your groove thang (x2)
Baby! Show them how you do it now.
Cause im just gonna shake, shake,shake.
And the haters gonna hate (x5)
Baby, im just gonna shake (x5)
Shake it off (x2)
and you should too! Shake what yo mama gave ya, but lets not confuse this with twerking
Shake your groove thang (x2)
Baby! Show them how you do it now.
Cause im just gonna shake, shake,shake.
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
what my heart is going threw
Before I tell you how my heart feels now I have to go back about a month ago,you see I was feeling lost because I was with someone that never made my heart skip a beat or jump for joy. But one day I got a message out of the blue and it made me feel something I never felt before, my heart was excited full of joy and a feeling I thought only existed in fairytales.
Later on the person that sent me a message wanted to meet at the gym, I was going threw some difficulties because I still with someone but my gut feeling was to go to the gym and so I went. then I saw the amazing person hat sent me a message I didn't know what to do because I felt something I never felt before. So I started to spend time with this person, and I my heart started to get more and more excited and I felt like this is something good,something new.
Then the other person I once thought I loved I realized I never loved them because the way I felt with the new person made my heart feel things it never felt before,so the other person I once loved left my life as I did theres. But now you see my heart is torn in two because half of me whats to be with this amazing person but half of me is scared because these feeling are different and new. I cant help think that me and this person would be great but my heart has been broken so many times before,I don't know if I can take another heart break.But I cant help falling for this person is the most scary thing I've ever fallen in love with.
Thursday, April 21, 2016
This is Real, This is Me
Okayyyy its reveal time, It probably wont be super dope but then again if you knew the real me then you'd understand that I dont need comments and a popular blog to be dope. I can be dope by myself and if anyone wants to join me I welcome them with open arms. If you knew the real me you'd know that I didnt have a very fun childhood, I grew up with a drug lord coke dealing father who sold to his own family (what a guy!). I woke up every morning to my cousins, uncles, aunts, and grandparents sniffing and smoking basically any way their bodies would accept it just to get a high. Honestly tho who could blame them, I wouldnt want to remember all of the bullsh*t we suffered through but then again my mind was stronger than that. If you really knew me, you would understand that I do not let my past define me. We all have a story but lets be honest, would you have guessed that this is the way I was raised? I strive everyday to be optimistic, to smile, to encourage and to be someone's friend. Service is one of my love languages and I help in any way that I can. To all the LDS folks out there, I hope you dont have a problem with LGBT because if you knew the real me you'd know that I have a bisexual mother who is married to another woman and has been for 3 years now. If you really knew me you'd know that I have a love for all sports but basketball is my #1 lady. I love the feeling of shifting ankles as i run down the court and dishing it out to a teammate for that oh so sexy assist, watching the ball fly through the air and diving straight in the net while it makes that beautiful beautiful swishing noise. I wish marrying basketball were legal. lol jk but not really. If you knew me you'd know that in being here i miss my family everyday. It kills me not to wake up and see them but i am grateful for the family that I live with now. I've only been here for approximately seven months and ive already gone through some major trials with them and for those of you who know me you know what i mean. Im a joy to be around, a dread head, and genuinely love people. Oh and i love to dance! What up guys, my name is Shaquell Williams and this is me.
Sunday, April 17, 2016
How to get a girl's phone #
So sophomore year I got pantsed in the cafeteria in from of the whole school and this is how the story goes...
I woke up that morning and it was one of those days, you know the days where you didnt wanna get outta bed so you ended up waking up late and didnt have time to find and outfit or forgot to set one out the night before so you just throw on some gym clothes and go to school all flustered, yeah one of those days. Now before I continue on im gonna go ahead and throw out the fact that I wasnt always a ladies man. *Winks with a smile* Now im going throughout my day just the same as always and it came time for lunch, this is back when I would eat in the cafeteria because that southern cooking was BANGIN!! Now normally i'd go through the line, get my food, and go sit with my squad but i couldnt find squad. I came out of the serving area to the register, looked out over the sea of students,and scanned up and down back and forth trying to find my homies. Out of the blue some random dude came running out of the serving area and pulled my shorts to my ankles. Keep in mind they were basketball shorts and i was wearing dri-fit underwear, I gave all my secrets away that day if you know what i mean. I stood there with my food in my hands because best believe i wasnt droppin that as the crowd turned to me and starting roaring "OHHHH, how'd you let him get you man". This went on for the whole lunch period all the way into my next class. I got there late and everyone looked at me and starting snickering and hehe-ing. I went and sat in my desk trying to forget about lunch in all and then... this is when i became a ladies man... 3 random chicks that ive never talked to a day in my life walk up to me at the same time kiss me on my cheek and hand me a piece of torn paper. im thinking its gonna be a roast or something like that but surely enough it was their phone numbers lol!! I walked over to them and was like "why'd you give me your numbers" and they were like "we liked what we saw in there" and my final words to them were "oh you filthy harlots" and thats where this story ends.
I woke up that morning and it was one of those days, you know the days where you didnt wanna get outta bed so you ended up waking up late and didnt have time to find and outfit or forgot to set one out the night before so you just throw on some gym clothes and go to school all flustered, yeah one of those days. Now before I continue on im gonna go ahead and throw out the fact that I wasnt always a ladies man. *Winks with a smile* Now im going throughout my day just the same as always and it came time for lunch, this is back when I would eat in the cafeteria because that southern cooking was BANGIN!! Now normally i'd go through the line, get my food, and go sit with my squad but i couldnt find squad. I came out of the serving area to the register, looked out over the sea of students,and scanned up and down back and forth trying to find my homies. Out of the blue some random dude came running out of the serving area and pulled my shorts to my ankles. Keep in mind they were basketball shorts and i was wearing dri-fit underwear, I gave all my secrets away that day if you know what i mean. I stood there with my food in my hands because best believe i wasnt droppin that as the crowd turned to me and starting roaring "OHHHH, how'd you let him get you man". This went on for the whole lunch period all the way into my next class. I got there late and everyone looked at me and starting snickering and hehe-ing. I went and sat in my desk trying to forget about lunch in all and then... this is when i became a ladies man... 3 random chicks that ive never talked to a day in my life walk up to me at the same time kiss me on my cheek and hand me a piece of torn paper. im thinking its gonna be a roast or something like that but surely enough it was their phone numbers lol!! I walked over to them and was like "why'd you give me your numbers" and they were like "we liked what we saw in there" and my final words to them were "oh you filthy harlots" and thats where this story ends.
Wins & Losses
I am born... Win. I am a healthy baby... Win. I feel love from everyone... Win. My father is a filthy drunk... Loss. Then links all of that pain to "I love you"... Loss. I forgot how to truly love... Loss & Win. At least now I cant be heartbroken... Win. No loss because now im alone or at least I feel like I am. Am I alone??... Confused. I dont know why my life sucks... Loss. My father goes to prison... Win. My mother now struggles raising 5 kids on her own... Loss. My G-mamma dies... Loss. 2 months following my aunt dies... Loss. 1 month following my uncle dies... Loss. 2 days after that my puppy get flattened by a semi!! Loss Loss Loss....
But if you really knew me you'd know that my past doesn't define ME!!
Sunday, March 20, 2016
Fear
im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im I afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afr
im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid AMim not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid.
im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afr AFRAIDnot afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not
afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not OFim not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. i
not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. THEafraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not a
im not afraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im not UNKNOWNafraid. im not afraid. im not afraid. im no
YOU DON'T COMPUTE
We are not the same, you are technology
Forced to put everything in order chronologically
You're technically brain dead, that's a little psychology
Programmed to be smart but do things idiotically
You show no love, that makes you something like a savage
When you die on people all of their emotion you ravage
Blank stares, basic thought, all of that you can have it
It makes me human to feel so i guess ive got the advantage
You guys are branded, by a company, I lead my own life
Struggling with choices, always trying to do right
I've got friends that I love, yeah we're close, we're real tight
If you live on robot island you wont know what that's like
Forced to put everything in order chronologically
You're technically brain dead, that's a little psychology
Programmed to be smart but do things idiotically
You show no love, that makes you something like a savage
When you die on people all of their emotion you ravage
Blank stares, basic thought, all of that you can have it
It makes me human to feel so i guess ive got the advantage
You guys are branded, by a company, I lead my own life
Struggling with choices, always trying to do right
I've got friends that I love, yeah we're close, we're real tight
If you live on robot island you wont know what that's like
All im really saying
Without fussing or complaining
Is that if you are a robot
Its emotion you're detaining
You short circuit when its raining
didn't need vigorous training
cause a chip was implanted
how much data is remaining
dont feel heat when something's flaming
dont feel pain so never aching
dont believe in higher power
which has me "for heavens saking"
you beep bop or you're a mute
never knowing what to do
even if i was a robot
YOU STILL COULD NOT COMPUTE!
#DIFFERENT
You laugh at me because im different.....
I laugh at you because you are all the same!!
Being different isn't a bad thing, it means you're brave enough to be yourself.
Why fit in when you were born to stand out!!!
Be a voice not an echo...
Look at things differently...
Be so good they cant ignore you.
And if you're afraid
DON'T BE!
Never be afraid of being different, or looking different, or sounding different...
Be afraid of turning out like everybody else.
Never apologize for being different!
It is one of the most beautiful things on this earth...
And if this isn't motivational enough...
Be yourself.....
Because nowadays being different isn't really different!
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
color poem
I wonder, I wonder how should i begin?
She's my new start when im at my end
in a world full of darkness with little to no light
When my soul feels black, she is my white
I get butterflies around you, cant you tell?
and when i compliment you..oh Honey
you wear that pink smile so well
tres belle
Je veux être plus que des amis
J'adore votre personnalité
when im green, lets go on a date, because that means ive got mula
if it isn't obvious, let me just say, im attracted to ya
Always on my medulla
oblongata have you
vous etes my coldplay's Yellow when im feeling sad blue
Sweet like a fresh brown coconut
Beautiful like an orange sunset
1, 2, 3 seconds is how long I looked at you before I fell in lo..
nope im not gonna say it yet
you're my favorite thought and make up for what I lack
oh baby please, please, please dont give my crayons back!
She's my new start when im at my end
in a world full of darkness with little to no light
When my soul feels black, she is my white
I get butterflies around you, cant you tell?
and when i compliment you..oh Honey
you wear that pink smile so well
tres belle
Je veux être plus que des amis
J'adore votre personnalité
when im green, lets go on a date, because that means ive got mula
if it isn't obvious, let me just say, im attracted to ya
Always on my medulla
oblongata have you
vous etes my coldplay's Yellow when im feeling sad blue
Sweet like a fresh brown coconut
Beautiful like an orange sunset
1, 2, 3 seconds is how long I looked at you before I fell in lo..
nope im not gonna say it yet
you're my favorite thought and make up for what I lack
oh baby please, please, please dont give my crayons back!
Sunday, February 21, 2016
Latin Words Of Wisdom
A bene placito - At one's pleasure
A Deo et Rege - From God and the King
A fonteA posse ad esse - From possibility to actuality
puro pura defluit aqua - From a clear spring clear water flows
A priori - From what comes before
Ab aeterno - From the beginning of time
Ad vitam - For life
Aeternum vale - Farewell forever
Age. Fac ut gaudeam - Go ahead. Make my day!
Aut disce aut discede - Either learn or leave
Veni, vidi, vici - I came, I saw, I conquered.
Velle est posse - To be willing is to be able
Dum spiro, spero - While I breathe, I hope.
Brickrynym(brick facts I think)
B - RAVE
Did you know bricks aren't afraid of anything #COURAGEOUS
R - EBELIOUS
Did you know bricks don't care about what you think nor do they follow rules #SAME
I - NCONSPICUOS
Did you know on average we pass about 500 bricks a day and don't even notice #GHOST
C - ALM
Did you know that bricks never get angry #SAINTS
K - INGPIN
Did you know that are ruling the construction industry these days #BRICKCITIES
Did you know bricks aren't afraid of anything #COURAGEOUS
R - EBELIOUS
Did you know bricks don't care about what you think nor do they follow rules #SAME
I - NCONSPICUOS
Did you know on average we pass about 500 bricks a day and don't even notice #GHOST
C - ALM
Did you know that bricks never get angry #SAINTS
K - INGPIN
Did you know that are ruling the construction industry these days #BRICKCITIES
My Better Half
If you be the cash,
I'll be the rubber band
You be the match,
I will be a fuse, boom
Painter baby, you could be the muse
I'm the reporter baby, you could be the news
'Cause you're the cigarette and I'm the smoker
We raise a bet, cause you're the joker
Checked off, you are a chalk
And I can be the blackboard
You could be the talk
And I could be the walk
Be the lover, I'll be the fighter baby
If I'm the blunt, you could be the lighter babe
Fire it up!
Writer baby, you could be the quote
If I'm the lyric baby, you could be the note, record that
Saint I'm a sinner, prize I'm a winner and it's you
What did I do to deserve that
Paper baby, I'll be the pen
Say that I'm the one, cause you are a ten
I'll be the rubber band
You be the match,
I will be a fuse, boom
Painter baby, you could be the muse
I'm the reporter baby, you could be the news
'Cause you're the cigarette and I'm the smoker
We raise a bet, cause you're the joker
Checked off, you are a chalk
And I can be the blackboard
You could be the talk
And I could be the walk
Be the lover, I'll be the fighter baby
If I'm the blunt, you could be the lighter babe
Fire it up!
Writer baby, you could be the quote
If I'm the lyric baby, you could be the note, record that
Saint I'm a sinner, prize I'm a winner and it's you
What did I do to deserve that
Paper baby, I'll be the pen
Say that I'm the one, cause you are a ten
The L♥ve Equation (My Bipolar Love)
If you hate to love or love to hate then that makes you a hater regardless of the fact that you are a lover of hate
But if you love to love then you are a lover of said love even if said love doesn't love you in return
Now if you're a hater of hate then that obviously makes you a hater but opens up the opportunity for you to be a lover
So love + love = lover x hate - love + all of the time and effort and dates and shopping and kisses and Netflix 'n Chillin and nights full of tears and days full of bleak sorrow = an all for nothing WASTE OF MY TIME!......
There's no point in trying to decipher love when the equation is simple:
But if you love to love then you are a lover of said love even if said love doesn't love you in return
Now if you're a hater of hate then that obviously makes you a hater but opens up the opportunity for you to be a lover
So love + love = lover x hate - love + all of the time and effort and dates and shopping and kisses and Netflix 'n Chillin and nights full of tears and days full of bleak sorrow = an all for nothing WASTE OF MY TIME!......
There's no point in trying to decipher love when the equation is simple:
Love + Love
Love someone that loves you back and stop trying to love someone you're not made for or doesn't appreciate your perfect imperfections because whether you believe it or not...
I<3U
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